I had dreams of "Matthew" last night.

He is the young boy we are in hopes of adopting.

I dreamt of Christmas gifts, and watching him play in the snow with our two year old. Of snuggling with him at night, and combing his curly black hair. 

I am not so naive to think that there won't be a period of adjustment. We are only a little informed about his past, so who knows what kind of baggage that will bring.

I am terrified of rejection.

I have a natural bond with my biological children. One born out of nose wiping, and spit-up cleaning. Nursing and rocking. The bond of safety that I have provided for them since birth.

"Matthew" has not had this safety. He has bounced around from house to house.  Been through...I don't know what. How can he trust anyone? How can I let him know that he has is forever home??