Friday, December 19, 2008

Like sands through the hour glass......

I talked to "M"'s social worker yesterday.

I am not feeling at all hopeful. I had mentioned in my last post, "M" has an aunt that wants to be considered. She hasn't even begun her newest (she already had been denied) home study.  That will need to be completed before a decision is made. She was given the chance to have custody of "M" as an infant, AND RETURNED HIM INTO STATE CUSTODY.  I do applaude the states efforts to reunify children with their bio families. However, when is it over kill?

If that wasn't enough, the  SW also told me that another family has expressed interest in "M". They are unable to have children of their own, and are business professionals (have $, is my guess). She told me that they would "be able to focus all of their time on "M" alone, and give him all the best."

When did that become most important?

We have "great advocacy skills, and a close knit family", I'm told.

AND..."M" has become very close to a foster sibling. "T" is 2 1/2, and has down syndrome. We would be given special consideration if we would consider taking both children.

Made me feel like I was at a BOGO sale at Payless.

"M" may go to the professional couple because he can be "the only child", yet if we would take the both of them we would move to the front of the list.

I don't get it.

I feel a little "played".

Andy and I have agreed that taking two young special needs children at the same time, would not be best for us (or them). With the baby (5 1/2 months), Gabi (2), and Ty (10), AND the teenagers...someone would be short changed. I am unwilling to chance it.

We want to be the best parents we can. To all our "babies".

 So, That's the latest.

I guess time will tell. If not "M", than another child for us. Maybe "M" is just the vehicle.....



Nelly said...

I truely beleave things happen for a reason. Before we got our son. I knew of a baby boy that another foster parent had. And they were not keeping him long so inquired about him and got the run around. Then we got the call for our son and I would not change a thing. I hope thing works out.

Corrine said...

Thanks for the words of encouragement.
It will work out, and will be perfect. Just like your son's arrival.

Lisa said...

I does sound a lot like you're being played.
Hoping it all works out. Holding my breath with you. Dealing with DCFS is always a roller coaster ride!

cloudmaster said...

We went through the process last year and have had our first foster child (a girl) since last December. Some of the people at DHHS in Maine have really impressed us......some....well, I am sure you have seen. Good luck, and there are such needs I am sure the right situation will come along for you soon